"Where do wars and fights come from among you? Do they not come from your desires for pleasure that war in your members? You lust and do not have, You murder and covet and cannot obtain. You fight and war. Yet you do not have because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask amiss, that you may spend it on your pleasures."
frustrated or fulfilled desire?
There are some things in life that are worth fighting for, but even in those situations, we should be demonstrating Christian behavior and fruits; love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control. (Gal.5:22) However, I have witnessed very few battles fought in this way. How about you?
When our daughter was two she was very upset and explained, “I just want what I want”. That sums up very well the root of many conflicts. When our primary interest is what we want, and what we want is what someone else has or what someone else does not want to do, we run into conflict. Unfortunately, as Christians, we then often come about the whole thing from a negative perspective of “do not”. We start feeling deprived of something we perceive as good, and we begin to see God as the withholder of good things. We fall into a mindset of believing that the things we want will make us happier than God can make us: then we deal with lusts, coveting, fighting and quarreling—we see the effects of a frustrated desire. We believe there are all these good, fun things out there, but God does not want us to have the enjoyment of them. We act like He just wants to lay upon us rules and regulations. And since rules and regulations do not captivate our heart, we sometimes feel stuck trying to obey with whatever will power we may have.
Why do we keep striving like this? I like how S.J.Hill puts it:
“People buy into the false premise that sin will make them happier than God can. Even though this is a lie, how many individuals honestly believe that obedience will bring a greater pleasure in their lives than sin ever could? If they really believed it, they wouldn’t want to sin. …people settle for far too little pleasure. They go after other lovers and lesser joys that can only give them momentary satisfaction. The things that quickly thrill them just as quickly disappoint them. They discover all too late that they’ve become entangled in a web of destructive behavior.”[1]
Take a look at any recent conflicts you have had. Can you find the root of the conflict? Was it more about a viewpoint? If so, what was the attitude behind the words? Or was it more about the feeling, “I want what I want”? What He has and wants and shares with you is even better!
Read and Pray: Psalm 36:7-9, Luke 12:31-32, Eph.1:3-6
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